EVE OF CHANGE

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Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less.
— Marie Curie

Change is never easy nor is it pleasant. It pushes us out of our comfort zone into the unknown which brings fear to the forefront. For years I had wanted change in my life but did not have the courage to go forward. I worried about the future. I worried how I would make things work. In the end, I knew I had to let go of those fears and trust that things will work out somehow.

On the eve of my move to the new place, I am looking forward to the change. Though I realise the house is not my dream house, I am thankful for having found a better home for my children than the current residence. Better in the sense there is room for them to play outdoors. Better in that we can now walk to school. Their father might think since he has a 'real' house the children are better off at his place, but such thinking is foolish.

Children adapt to situations easier than do adults. As I watch my children play or colour or read, I notice they are not looking for the perfect table on which to draw or the ideal couch on which to read. They adapt to what is before them and they make the best out of the situation. Though we would prefer a dining table with chairs at which to share our meals, we have learned to adapt to our coffee table and cushions knowing that one day we will have our own house with more comfortable seating. Being together is what matter most, no matter the circumstances.

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Earlier in the day, I was informed I would not have the children for five weeks this summer as their father has chosen to exercise his right to take them this year. There was no mention of whether the children would be leaving the country or staying in town despite my inquiry. My oldest daughter started to cry as she realised she would spend another summer without me, seeing how her father had her and her siblings last summer when he took them to Berlin. How the changes of the summer will affect the children are yet to be seen.

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Life is change and change is life. By observing the fearlessness of children, we can learn how to understand our circumstances better and be less fearful when change comes our way. Without change, we are unable to move forward and experience life to the fullest. A chance taken is better than wondering what could have been had we not been afraid to take the chance.